• The Northman

    The Northman


    The glory that is found in the eyes of whom who beholds this exposure, will find many virtues to uphold. The power within this epic is not the state nor the scale of it’s portrayal but the wisdom that seeks far beyond what has been seen. The dogmatic backdrop allows for a tail with much gradation. Taking what one knows of revenge and busting it’s head open to reveal the parts that you never thought you would comprehend. Once you…

  • Zola



    A Swashbuckling romp for the only fans era

  • Sonic the Hedgehog 2

    Sonic the Hedgehog 2

    With all the pop culture references and topical goofs and gags I was deeply disappointed when I realized that throughout the entire runtime there was no scene where sonic was crucified!!! 
    1 star.

  • Metal Lords

    Metal Lords


    For a movie that mentions the word “metal” in every other sentence, the focus on the actual process of making music is very far and few between.

  • You Were Never Really Here

    You Were Never Really Here


    One sorrow night, I was driving home from the fight club. The lights were flashing, and in that very moment the beast inside me slowly came to a dull roar. For once I was no longer blinded by my own rage. The American psycho bruiting inside me had vanished.  and for as long as I took this notion without contempt; I may breathe without a laugh. For I am no longer the Joker of my own story.

  • A Nightmare on Elm Street

    A Nightmare on Elm Street


    My girlfriend is trying to get me to touch her tits but I’m writing a review……………

    It was ok

  • The Batman

    The Batman


    Finally the one unexplored character aspect of the Batman comes to life. Begging the question…what if he was emo????????????

  • Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

    Dawn of the Planet of the Apes


    The energy that harmonizes the individual is consciousness, it’s our apprehension that will make us strong or play into our own downfall.

  • The Dirt

    The Dirt


    If this movie was just that one POV scene extended for a feature length runtime I’d love it. Typical biopic fair but I like the tight pants.

  • Scream



    Fucking great!!!!!

  • Scream 3

    Scream 3


    What I said about the second one still applies. Just know that I love you Dewey.

  • Scream 2

    Scream 2


    Pretty on par but now the formula has taken over and takes most of the magic from the first one.