The Descent

The Descent ★★★★

Not all horror movies are scary, and not all scary movies evoke horror. I thought that The Descent really did a great job with both. I don't watch a lot of scary movies because I get really scared. I mean, really scared. I have a hard time watching the stupid jump scares they show in trailers for scary movies. I can't watch scary movies in the theatre because I scream at inappropriate times (and maybe cry). When I watch at home, I can't have the remote nearby because I will change the channel when shit goes down. When I'm alone at night I run into my apartment because I imagine Michael Myers hiding in the bushes, and when I wash my face at night I always expect to see something in the mirror when I open my eyes.

So yea, I'm a total wuss.

But every once in a while I get in the mood for a good scare, and boy did The Descent deliver.

I honestly don't know if I watched more than half of it, really, because I was definitely hiding behind a pillow for a good chunk of the movie. Normally when I scream during scary movies, I'll get startled, scream, immediately cover my face with the pillow and stop screaming, and then just sort of wait it out for a bit from behind the pillow.

With The Descent, I would scream, cover my face with the pillow, and then keep. on. screaming. into the pillow. For a longer time than was really necessary. screaming.

So aside from the scares, of which there were plenty, I thought it did a good job with the horror element, a little bit of good mind-fuck horror. And yay, strong ladies who I didn't think were too terrible or obnoxious and who were treated pretty well, in the grand scheme of horror movie lady-victims. It even felt like there was a bit of a take-back-the-night, rape-revenge quality to some of the scenes, which was maybe weird? and I might have examined further if I wasn't busy shitting myself out of fear.

Overall, a fun time. I just had to watch the fart gun scene from Despicable Me several times before I could go to sleep that night. And my husband made that noise the creatures make only once, because I told him that if he did it again, I would break his fucking nose. Keys to a good marriage, yall.

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