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  • Hardcore Henry

    Hardcore Henry

    ★★

    Would've rated it half a star, were it not for a couple of decent action sequences and a batshit Sharlto Copley. Everything else is terrible.

    Fair play to them for trying something different, but it apes the video game aesthetic a little too well. You're itching to take control and skip the shitty cut scenes and awful dialogue.

  • I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House

    I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House

    ★★½

    Beautifully shot and a genuine feeling of dread at times, but for the majority of the running time it's just exceptionally dull.

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  • Krampus: The Christmas Devil

    Krampus: The Christmas Devil

    ½

    It earns the half star because, credit where credit is due, sometimes the camera was in focus.

  • Scary Movie 2

    Scary Movie 2

    ½

    Set myself a dumb challenge a few weeks ago to watch everything in the Netflix UK horror section that I hadn't already seen. Been regretting it ever since.

    Scary Movie 2 is absolutely terrible. No redeeming features whatsoever. It's like they were deliberately trying to make a comedy with zero laughs. If they were, then this film is a huge success.

    I don't think they were though.

    Fun(?) fact. Before I rated this film, it had 420 half-star ratings. *THAT* I laughed at. Then I ruined it by making it 421. Sorry.