Fantasy Island

There are only 2 sure ways that will get me to watch something:

1. One of the many men I find hot is in it.
2. I hear there's a TWIST, but not just any twist, a super fucking dumb one.

When it comes to this piece of trash, it's 2.

As far as I'm concerned there is only one fantasy island that matters and this shit here ain't it. The twist is so flimsy and it's delivered in such a nonchalant and hurried way, it actually made me laugh. But then there's the next twist which is even dumber than the one before it.

The acting is almost universally horrible (Kim Coates creates a gem of "so bad that it's funny" performance), the tone is all over the place, it feels about 5 hours long (Jesus Christ, this fucker wouldn't end!) and the only somewhat likable character is the one played by Maggie Q, who gives a performance that this movie isn't worthy of. Just...a total mess.

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