Cinephile-turned-just some guy who watches movies.
Short stories (written as WH Gilbert) can be found through that link above☝🏻
REQUIEM FOR A LUMPY
Lumpy, a life-long resident of Haddonfield, Illinois, died tragically on the night of October 30th, 2018 at the age of 14. He is believed to be one of the victims of elusive but definitely not supernatural in any way serial killer Michael Myers.
Lumpy, known as "Kevin" by friends, was pulled out of school for one of his regular middle-of-the-week late-night hunting trips with his father. He is said to have been a crack-shot with a…
The Lonesome Death of #DumpsterDaddy
Dumpster Daddy was a man with a Problem. He could not, would not get out of the dumpster. His life was garbage and he knew it, so he tried to find the silver lining and find glory in the trash. You might think he's going to build something for his depressed daughter, but no. You might think there is some kind of motivation behind his addiction, this sickness, but no. He just loves the garbage.…
Me: “The 70s were crazy. You could be a magician and own two homes?”
KC: “On a Grabber’s salary, no less.”
After seeing this trailer over and over again for a lifetime…does Black Phone live up to the hype? Kinda! Mostly, yeah? It’s funny to me that Joe Hill started publishing under a different last name to separate himself from comparisons to his dad, but he cannot help but write stories like King. He is truly his father’s son, the…
Man I was first in line from the moment I read the words “Baz Luhrmann to direct Elvis biopic” and I’d only grown more excited since. When that first trailer dropped, this thing skyrocketed to the top of my most anticipated list, right below Salem’s Lot. It didn’t seem like I could be any more in the bag for this until I saw David Erlich’s negative review out of Cannes. Beautiful. That’s all I needed. Chef’s kiss. It…
Aight. I'm drawing a line in the sand.
As a society we can either:
-continue to lie to ourselves and say this movie is "bad", or whatever...or
-we can all finally come to our senses and admit the undeniable truth that Tim Burton's late-in-the-game masterpiece is one of the most aesthetically beautiful movies to be released this century