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  • Evil Dead II

    Evil Dead II

    ★★★★★

    10/10

    The height of cinema.

  • Halloween II

    Halloween II

    ★★

    4.5/10

    Isn't Halloween the busiest night of the year for hospitals? What is this boring bullshit? If this was in Derry Michael would be spending his time murderizing hundreds of drunk 16 year olds with missing fingers who tried to jack off a firework.

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  • Freddy vs. Jason

    Freddy vs. Jason

    ★★★½

    7/10

    What they do with Freddy and Jason: 👌
    What they do with the human characters: 👎

  • Alone in the Dark

    Alone in the Dark

    ½

    1.5/10

    Part of Garbage Day: Video Games.

    Hitman had 47 as a faux-antagonist for a bit. Max Payne had really good cinematography. This movie has Christian Slater's weird face, and it just isn't enough.