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  • Song to Song

    Song to Song

    "Wig to Wig" starring Rooney Mara, in the epic story of a filmmaker pulling a long-con on his followers by doing the same exact thing over and over again, to see how long they'll keep projecting profound meaning onto empty snippets of little importance.

    This is where I lose some (more) of you. And that's okay. But I just can't say that Malick is even trying to say anything anymore, if I wish to keep my dignity.

    I hate to…

  • The Fate of the Furious

    The Fate of the Furious

    Some could call this "dumb fun," and to be fair, I can see it being a banger of a drinking game with the #youths. But in my opinion, this is so outrageously ludacris (heh), with dialogue so stilted and acting so atrocious, it has far surpassed even the realm of self-parody and entered another universe of unfathomable stupidity altogether.

    The fact that this movie (THIS MOVIE) is responsible for the highest grossing opening weekend of ALL TIME, EVER is the…

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  • Elle

    Elle

    ★★★★½

    Against my better judgement, you're all about to read one of the most personal things I've written. Because why not? It's much easier to say these things to a bunch of people you've never met, after all.

    After Michéle is assaulted (the first time), she cleans the broken dishes off the floor, throws away the dress she was wearing, takes a bubble bath, and orders sushi.

    After I was assaulted, I asked him to drive me back to my dorm,…

  • The Witch

    The Witch

    ★★★★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    But is there really a witch?, I thought, after first reading about this film over a year ago. I was mostly expecting this to be an ambiguous tale where the titular evil-doer was metaphorical, an approach that's not unfamiliar to arthouse films of today. But my inner darkness was absolutely delighted to discover this was not the case.

    A mere 10 minutes in (maybe, I was too entranced to look at my watch) and we're witness to the stringy-haired, naked…