everything Mandy should've been.

The worst part of Guadagnino and screenwriter David Kajganich's previous 'remake' (A Bigger Splash, also starring Swinton and Johnson) of a slenderly-plotted Euro film (La Piscine) was opportunistically padding the story with a half-assed subtext-turned-subplot about the ongoing Mediterranean refugee crisis for seemingly no reason other than to flatter their own (and their audience's) sense of political conscientiousness. Apparently someone watched that film, enthusiastically told them both 'do more of that', and the result is this 2.5-hour j/o motion.

"Or what? You'll release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you?"