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  • Four Adventures of Reinette and Mirabelle

    Four Adventures of Reinette and Mirabelle

    ★★★★

    Sort of fascinating how, with just four episodes following two starkly different characters, Rohmer deconstructs how much of a bias an environment can serve a narrative. From The Blue Hour, where a countryside dream befits too dreamy personalities – one wandering and one anchored (but soon to switch), to the metropolitan chaos of the following three episodes, both Reinette and Mirabelle shift from characters to full semblances of actual people, but each person, narratively, defies the last.

    I couldn’t help…

  • Blood Bath

    Blood Bath

    ★★★

    Jack Hill and Stephanie Rothman are an exploitative dream team for the ages. Aesthetically, there are few things as striking to me as a shadowy, Venice Beach chase sequence between a vampire and a young woman in trouble that culminates on a carousel.

    Cackling she-ghouls can curse me and my ancestors to a doomed vampirism any day.

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  • Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)

    Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)

    ★★★½

    Bopper!!! Aside from one too many eye-roll-inducing needle drops, this was brutal bubblegum fun. I love women so much more than men.

    Essentially Down with Love if Zellweger and Paulson were going pew-pew-pew and hi-ya! and McGregor was playing the same level of camp just with a few extra flourishes of enlisting Chris Messina to remove the faces of a sobbing family as they muffle-plead for their life.

    I’m serious about that first point, though. Spiderbait’s “Black Betty” ought to have been imprisoned for life after 2008.

  • A Very Brady Christmas

    A Very Brady Christmas

    I remember my parents turning this off as a kid because of a sex scene and I have since considered it to be the tawdry, “adults only” outing of the Brady Bunch.

    Turns out it was just Jan getting her cardigan removed by her husband. 

    This movie is almost entirely the Brady’s making and coordinating holiday plans and reviewing logistical details for their travels in the ugliest and most bland settings possible.

    It is somehow even hornier than the show…