Julian has written 21 reviews for films rated ★★ .

  • Ambulance

    Ambulance

    ★★

    Evidentially my love for Gyllenhaal isn't enough to compensate for the utterly ridiculous Bay bulls**t.

  • Crimes of the Future

    Crimes of the Future

    ★★

    Did the nudity in this film serve a purpose other than satisfying the male gaze? This entire film felt fetishized and overplayed.

  • The Northman

    The Northman

    ★★

    A cautionary tale of toxic masculinity?
    I loved Egger's previous two films, but this just felt overproduced and empty. Where was the magic sauce that allowed me to suspend disbelief? More than disappointed, I'm gutted.

  • I Want You Back

    I Want You Back

    ★★

    Oh, they tried, really tried, but it just didn't work for me.

  • Surge

    Surge

    ★★

    What the F? 
    Ben Whishaw is terrifyingly committed to his performance, but I'm not sure what this film was about beyond the impressive performance. The shaky hand held camera work gave me a headache and I was (literally) nauseous. Just a little more focus would have been appreciated.

  • Queen Bees

    Queen Bees

    ★★

    So poorly written.

  • The Tragedy of Macbeth

    The Tragedy of Macbeth

    ★★

    Nope. You would have to pay me, handsomely, to sit through this again.

  • The Tender Bar

    The Tender Bar

    ★★

    What does JR stand for?
    The same question asked over and over. Absolutely nothing interesting happens in this movie, Poor boy grows up without a dad, but his name is Junior. Ben Affleck tells him to read a closet full of books. This makes him smart enough to go to Yale (his mom wants him to be a lawyer). He talks about being a novelist, but he doesn't appear to be making an effort. JR loves a girl who doesn't…

  • Lady of the Manor

    Lady of the Manor

    ★★

    I adore Melanie Lynskey, but I'm going to go ahead and forget I ever saw this (and whatever Ryan Phillippe has done to his face).

  • Titane

    Titane

    ★★

    Nope.

  • Four Good Days

    Four Good Days

    ★★

    No.

  • Cherry

    Cherry

    ★★

    I hate bad voice over narration.