Phantom Thread ★★★★★

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to express how important Alma is to me.

There have been many characters that have almost been her, but none of them have ever come close. She embodies everything I am, everything I’ve tried to be, and everything I’ve ever wanted to be. I’ve thought myself to be Alma before, but I’ve never been brave enough. She’s weak, but is stronger than anyone she’s around. She’s kind, but could break every bone in every body with her words. And yet, she’s in love.

She does something I’ve never been able to do. She does what I’ve always dreamed of doing and have constantly beat myself up for not being able to. Alma is cruel without warning. She can stand up for herself without fear, because she knows what she wants. And yet at the same time, she can be gentle and kind. She craves attention, which in most films is seen as annoying or unjustified, but she completely owns it. I long for attention but don’t know how to get it without sounding like a blubbering idiot, and I only want it from people who don’t like showing it. But whenever I watch Phantom Thread, over and over again, I find strength in Alma.

Whenever I feel unimportant, or alone, or less than what I am, I try to imagine I’m Alma. I find comfort in her. Her ability to go through Reynolds, and her ability to discover herself through other people. She gets what she wants and how she wants it, and I understand every fiber of who she is. She’s truly the love of my life, and I can’t wait to discover her even more.

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