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jay has written 202 reviews for films during 2017.

  • Gone Girl

    Gone Girl

    ★★★★

    rosamund pike gives the best performance of her career so far, a force to be reckoned with in the years to come, one of the greatest leading women in film since the bride in kill bill and will always be an icon in my eyes

    ben affleck is good, too

  • The Greatest Showman

    The Greatest Showman

    ★★★½

    so i went to see this again because the gap between chrisis and new year is just the worst. wheres zendayas oscar for pretending to fall in love with zac efron

  • They Live

    They Live

    ★★★★

    im trying to work out if the horror channel showing this at the end of christmas season was intentional


    C O N S U M E

  • The Greatest Showman

    The Greatest Showman

    ★★★½

    im conflicted my dudes, because this is a musical done right, but its a shame its taken the route of a biography/muscial. 

    while pt barnum was a real person, hes written different to benefit the tone of a musical. you could say this is the same as ed wood where the title character is portrayed far more cartoonish than ed wood really was, but in contrast to the greatest showman, ed wood still follows the lows and highs of the…

  • Elves

    Elves

    "i need to know the connection between the elves and the nazis!" ah yes, that iconic christmas line

  • The Polar Express

    The Polar Express

    ★★★

    • there was an arguement with my family over watching this or the grinch. i lost

    • when will kid tom hanks stop testing the girl you couldnt even keep a ticket safe

    • the script reading for this was just tom hanks talking to himself alone

  • Elf

    Elf

    ★★½

    id never watched this before now and honestly of all the christmas movies this is the one dory accounts and pop culture hype up the most? eh

    the main drive of elf is a lot of fish out of water humour with a light anti-commercialism message however it remains fun through the first act, its a shame it runs out of steam after the store sequence

  • Krampus

    Krampus

    ★★★★

    i know for a fact in a few years this will be every edgy kids favourite christmas film


    i know this bc i am an edgy kid

  • The Wolverine

    The Wolverine

    ★★½

    re-title this wolverine: gap year because this white girl spends his summer saving the wildlife and having irrelevant experiences in japan

  • Vile

    Vile

    ★½

    this has been a go to bad-horror-film-to-watch-while-i-fall-asleep for me for years now and i was curious to what the directors been up to, turns out he ended up making wind river, glow tf UP

    (i dug taylor sheridans bullshit before it was cool)

  • Bright

    Bright

    ★½

    "im making a suicide squad of directors and screenwriters"

    [viola davis flips open files to reveal david ayer and max landis]

    "the worst of the worst"

  • Free Fire

    Free Fire

    ★★★

    when it comes to one room thrillers they either hit, or dont, and while free fire is by no means a bad film, it unfortunately misses the mark. the quirky dialogue exchanges start off strong but once each character takes up arms behind every pillar in the warehouse the movie writes itself into a dead end with no intelligent twists or gripping stakes to keep me engaged. 

    there is a fun set piece late on involving two injured characters fighting…