Hank Mardukas 🎟 🎞

Hank Mardukas 🎟 🎞


This is my Captain’s Log of everything I’ve watched since January 1st 2017.

Favorite films

  • Almost Famous
  • That Thing You Do!
  • Hot Rod
  • Before Sunset

Recent activity

  • The Making of 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles': Behind the Shells


  • Hellboy


  • Cloud Atlas


  • Super Mario Bros.


Pinned reviews

  • Batman & Robin

    Batman & Robin

    Part Two of Joel Schumacher Tribute Day afterΒ Phone Booth.

    Another Schumacher movie that holds a special place in my heart, but only because of the memory of the day I saw it and its great soundtrack. Honorable Mention to Uma Thurman for having the most fun ever. I wish Freeze wasn’t in this, because it would be shorter and it would’ve been all Uma.Β 

    In the summer of 1997, I was sent on a month long trip with my Grandparents…

  • 3 Ninjas

    3 Ninjas



    That’s right. Three hundred and nineteen. Three hundred and nineteen what, you ask? 319 Hiyahs!Β No oneΒ asked for it, but I counted 319 hiyahs between all three of the ninjas.

    Thankfully this movie has only 3 action set pieces and then an end credit rap song featuring them calledΒ "Kid Power"Β by Will Roc, but it’s the only sound (word) you hear from each of them every time they fight. I know it’s in almost every martial arts movie, but when I…

Recent reviews

  • Cloud Atlas

    Cloud Atlas


    The first time I saw this was a weekday matinee screening in the huge RPX theater in Denver. One of the benefits of working at the Sie Film Center was getting passed in to the RPX & IMAX theaters, so I saw movies whenever I had free time. And since it was a weekday matinee, it was pretty empty inside and Denver crowds weren’t known for clapping anyway.Β 

    Seeing this on that huge screen and hearing this score through that sound…

  • Vanilla Ice: Ninja Rap

    Vanilla Ice: Ninja Rap


    My man Rob Van Winkle made this song ICE, baby.Β 

    The pointless extended instrumental at the end to show more dancing was excellent.Β 

    Watched onΒ YouTube.

    TMNT Ranked

Popular reviews

  • Everything Everywhere All at Once

    Everything Everywhere All at Once


    I’ll never hearΒ "Absolutely (Story of a Girl)"Β by Nine Days or think of Ratatouille the same way ever again. (Edit 4/11/22) Here’s aΒ linkΒ to a great article about Nine Days involvement with the whole film. It’s more amazing than I thought.Β 

    Maybe my favorite Michelle Yeoh performance? She’s amazing. And it’s so great to have Ke Huy Quan back on screen. I had no clue he knew how to fight! He kicked ass with a Fanny Pack! And then got to have…

  • Wrinkles the Clown

    Wrinkles the Clown


    There’s a moment where they’re in a motel room with Wrinkles and you hear this news report in the background: Β 

    β€œFlorida Man arrested for having sexual relations with a miniature horse on several occasions...”

    Fucking Florida.

    There’s not one mention of ICP or Juggalos, but at least there’s a clip from Killer Klowns.Β