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  • Saw II

    Saw II

    ★★

    Donnie Wahlberg is (circle one) GREAT/TERRIBLE/APPEARS in this movie. The twist is forced and convoluted as fuck. Though the original saw from the first film makes a late appearance, no sawing whatsoever.

  • Saw

    Saw

    ★★★

    Goofy, already very dated, but likeable enough. Despite title, very little sawing.

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  • Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    I don't want to beat a dead horse here, but such a fucking boring drag. From about frame one.....

    There are many moments that make me question if Snyder understands basic narrative at all. Hmmm, when's a good time to intro some slow, pointless Justice league info, shown to us while someone slowly and methodically parses some computer files? I've got it! The shot after literally introducing a ticking countdown clock during the climax! Brilliant!*

    *not sure if it's the…

  • Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

    Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

    ★★★

    Goofy (mostly by design) but not without charm. 

    Fun fact: Dane Dehaan is terrible!