Joey Shapiro

beautiful cultured genius who has never had a wrong opinion in his life

Favorite films

  • Paris, Texas
  • Don't Look Now
  • House
  • Gremlins

Recent activity

All
  • The Black Hole

    ★★★

  • The Hot Rock

    ★★★★½

  • The Getaway

    ★★★★

  • Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers

    ★★★½

Recent reviews

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  • The Black Hole

    The Black Hole

    ★★★

    A little Star Wars knock-off, a little 2001 knock-off, but without any of the excitement of either. Still has the zany talking robot back-and-forth you know and love from these movies!! I like when the good robot has a sharpshooting contest with the bully robot and just straight up kills him for no good reason.

  • The Hot Rock

    The Hot Rock

    ★★★★½

    A perfectly structured heist(s) movie, the tightest 100 minutes imaginable, like four different Ocean’s movies spliced together with all the boring parts excised. Pure unfettered entertainment, baby!! Hard to imagine any movie of its kind beating it out, if only because it’s essentially just four incredible climactic heist sequences strung together. I want a sequel where they break in and out of four more institutions (A hospital? The White House? The Magic Castle?)

Popular reviews

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  • The Fountain

    The Fountain

    Lena Dunham is the shame of Oberlin College but at least it’s nice to see the Allen Memorial Art Museum in the background of a motion picture event.

  • Fear Street: 1994

    Fear Street: 1994

    ★★★

    Honestly very shocked by how competent and fun this is! Most slasher throwbacks tend to just coast by on obnoxious, beat-you-over-the-head nostalgia to capture the elusive Stranger Things Demographic™ (still having bad flashbacks to AHS: 1984), but this one actually captures the feel of '90s horror for me. Very indebted to Scream (the opening in particular) and It Follows, and the characters aren't 2% as memorable or well-rounded as the ones in those two movies, but it's more than good…