• Hustle

    Hustle

    ★★★

    Pretty much hits every note you expect of most sports movies, but the exuberance of Sandler’s performance combined with the use of actual NBA players as actors is enough to carry it into the fun zone. Anthony Edwards was fantastic!

  • Top Gun: Maverick

    Top Gun: Maverick

    ★★★★

    In which an illustrious superstar continues to risk life and limb by performing absurd death-defying stunts, even as shiny new tech increasingly threatens to relegate his craft and abilities to outdated modes of the past. Best summer blockbuster in what feels like ages.

  • Uncharted

    Uncharted

    ★★

    Pretty bad but watchable in that it keeps moving through a fairly merciful runtime. Very funny that Mark and Tom are both just doing their patented schtick with little regard for the source material. Tom is Spider-Man without the webs, Mark is definitely still some guy from Boston. Action scenes are some of the worst offenders of bad CGI that I’ve seen in a little while.

  • X

    X

    ★★★★

    Major ass kicker. Can’t wait to watch this again on a hot and sweaty midsummer night. Been seeing a lot of people I usually trust talking about how “nothing happens for the first hour” but I could hardly disagree more. I got plenty of enjoyment out of just marinating in the spectacularly creepy setup and all the 70s aesthetic worship. Really loved it!

  • Deep Water

    Deep Water

    Cuck everlasting.

    Has this been done yet? Wish this dove a little deeper into the psychology of these two deeply whacky people but it was still fun to watch Ben sulk around and Ana de Armas be insanely hot. Maybe I'm too easy to please, but I don't need much more out of my movies than that.

  • The Bubble

    The Bubble

    I can understand why most people seem to hate this with every fibre of their being, but I really didn’t! It’s one of Judd’s weaker efforts, but I laughed enough to justify the watch. Harry Trevaldwyn’s demonstration of how to “make eyes” with someone as to avoid any sexual contact was honestly enough to make the whole thing worth it. Excited to see whatever he gets up to next. 

    Even though this movie is making fun of the “content machine”…

  • Death on the Nile

    Death on the Nile

    You see that poster, with all its ambient light and gorgeous colour tones? Well, it's completely unrepresentative of the actual film, which is over-lit to within an inch of its life. Not a single scene in this movie appears to be occurring in the natural world, let alone the Nile River. Most of the external shots reminded me of a custom screensaver on Windows XP.

    The biggest draw of these movies has always been the sumptuous and exotic locales (hello,…

  • Jackass Forever

    Jackass Forever

    Laughed my ass off for the entire 90 minutes. Always impressed by the visual creativity of these stunts. They're incredibly gnarly, but the visual gags these guys manage to come up with really elevate the material to a higher plane. The colony of bees hanging off Steve-O's dick, Wee Man strapped down in the middle of a graveyard with meat hanging out his underwear while a hungry buzzard saunters over, Knoxville running around with night vision goggles in a pitch-black…

  • Blood Rage

    Blood Rage

    Rewatch confirms Blood Rage as one of the most underrated slashers of all time (or if not underrated, then at least underseen). Frequently hilarious explosions of violence, character interactions, and performances with an aggressively cheap and shaggy late-fall visual aesthetic to die for.

    It's not entirely clear to me whether the comedy is intentional or not, but therein lies the beauty. Far too many horror parodies/tributes have tipped their hand with a nudge-wink attitude which ultimately disservices the humour. Intentionality…

  • Just Go with It

    Just Go with It

    There are a lot of criticisms you can reasonably level at Sandler and his other "lazy" films of this ilk (and many have, ironically, jumped at such low-hanging fruit) but I find the hangout vibes too charming and the locations too beautiful for that. The movie is indeed lazy, and it appears that Sandler used the movie's budget to finance a nice vacation, but it's fun to go along on that journey with him and his friends when their exuberance…

  • The Batman

    The Batman

    ★★★★½

    Matt Reeves’ most visually accomplished movie and clearly one of the best looking movies I’ve ever had the pleasure of watching on the big screen. One of those miracle moments where every aspect of the production comes together perfectly. Grieg Fraser’s expressive and exceptionally wet cinematography is indeed reminiscent of earlier Fincher movies, but it’s also the closest approximation of actual comic book panels that I’ve ever seen in the live action format. I’m not a big comic book guy,…

  • Spider-Man: No Way Home

    Spider-Man: No Way Home

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    No Way Home pulls off the difficult trick of packing in some of the most beautifully rendered imagery and pathos of the entire MCU.... and also some of the worst!

    It is often a very ugly movie and the reliance on unconvincing green-screen environments seems to have reached a fever pitch. Whether because of Covid limitations or some other reason, most scenes appear disconnected from reality in a way that's impossible to ignore. I don't expect that everything should look…