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  • The Vampire Doll

    The Vampire Doll

    ★★

    Toho does Hammer to... dull results.

  • Our House

    Our House

    ★★

    I kept waiting for things to get scary. It's such an interesting idea for a horror movie, but we spend 80% of the run time waiting for stuff to take off. Missed opportunity.

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  • The Greasy Strangler

    The Greasy Strangler

    UPDATE: It's now been four months since I've seen this film. I think about it at least once a day, and have every day, since June the 14th. Yes, this is a one-star review, but in reality, it's a secret four-star affair.

    It's like Napoleon Dynamite, The Room, Swamp Thing and Todd Solondz beat each other to death inside a Tim & Eric sketch, all set to a soundtrack from a Dan Deacon copycat.

    The titular 'Greasy Strangler' looks like famed…

  • Mortal Kombat: Annihilation

    Mortal Kombat: Annihilation

    ½

    This is, by the absolute loosest human understanding of the word, a movie.