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  • Alien: Covenant

    Alien: Covenant

    ★★½

    It seems like even the creator himself has forgotten what made his creation so special.

  • Wonder Woman

    Wonder Woman

    ★★

    First half: "Could it be? Have they finally got it?"

    Second half: "Nope. Nope."

    Gal Gadot and Chris Pine's chemistry? On point.

    Everything else? Trash.

    Cheesy as hell. Cheap-looking effects. Slo-mo galore. Lackluster writing. Riddled with pacing issues. Completely dropped the ball on Ares. Climactic battle is one, ugly, CGI-overloaded mess.

    But worst of all? The whole movie is, ultimately, utterly useless. No set-up whatsoever. You know the show Lost? You know that episode about Jack's tattoo? Wonder Woman is…

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  • Fantastic Four

    Fantastic Four

    Dear Fox,

    Now can you please return the Fantastic Four back to Marvel?

    Thank you.

    Sincerely,
    Everyone

  • Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    ★★

    Gonzo's 2016 Movie Rankings

    Is it good?
    Mmm... Nnn... Yea... Kinda... Nnnot really...

    What? Yes or no, man? Yes or no?!
    ...

    ...
    ...

    Okay, is BvS Batman Part 1 or Man of Steel 2?
    Both. The movie begins and ends with Bruce Wayne and the main plot deals with the aftermath of the events in Man of Steel.

    How's Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne/Batman?
    Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne is Ben Affleck. Bale did a better job, but…