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  • The Little Mermaid

    The Little Mermaid

    ★★★

    I forgot about half the characters in this movie since I last rewatched as a kid. Like, sure, there's a seagull. Fine!

  • Aladdin

    Aladdin

    ★★★

    My friends go way harder for this movie than I do, but I never connected with it the way the rest of my generation has, I suppose.

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  • The Perfect Guy

    The Perfect Guy

    ★★★

    MICHAEL EALY PUTS A USED TOOTHBRUSH IN HIS MOUTH AND BASICALLY TRIES TO SWALLOW IT, WHICH WAS THE KIND OF RIDICULOUS SHIT I PAID TO SEE HERE! THANKS MICHAEL EALY!!!

  • God's Not Dead

    God's Not Dead

    Terribly offensive propaganda.