Favorite films

  • Super Buddies
  • Snow Buddies
  • Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom
  • Treasure Buddies

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  • A Walk to Remember

    ★★★½

  • Albert Brooks: Defending My Life

    ★★★½

  • The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes

  • Moulin Rouge!

    ★★★★★

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  • The Whale

    The Whale

    ★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    [taylor swift voice]

    🎶Cause there we are again in your little living room
    You’re teaching your kids, camera off over zoom
    You're so sick, Moby Dick
    I remember it All Too Whale

    You left us for your student and now you want my love
    You nearly choked to death on a big meatball sub
    Write my essay, dad you're gay
    I remember it All Too Whale🎶

    Two stars!

  • Original Cast Album: Company

    Original Cast Album: Company

    ★★★★

    Here's to the film lads who log
    Everybody read
    Make sure people see how well cultured they are
    Maybe you’ll agree

    A Duvernay, or PTA
    A family film by George Miller
    Adapted plays, or French New Wave
    A sexy 80s thriller
    ...I'll log to that.

    Here's to the guys who make lists
    Don't they have great taste
    Never could they waste even one precious thought
    In a private space

    Off to their apps, then to the boards
    Look whose opinion…

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  • A Walk to Remember

    A Walk to Remember

    ★★★½

    This movie was nominated but lost the 2002 Teen Choice Award for Best Movie Liplock. Other nominees included Adam Sandler and Winona Ryder in Mr. Deeds, Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman in Attack of the Clones, but ultimately it went to Kirsten Dunst and Tobey Maguire for Spider-Man. I think they deserved it. Adam Shankman would go on to direct another iconic kiss: Alec Baldwin and Russell Brand in Rock of Ages 😻

    "Please. My (Child)Wife. She's Very Sick." Three and a half stars!

  • The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes

    The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes

    ME WATCHING OG HUNGER GAMES MOVIES: Wow that Donald Sutherland Snow guy sure is evil. But...I bet he wasn't always that way. I wonder what made him so cruel! Why, I reckon I'd watch upwards of 3 films about his origin story. This is definitely the most interesting story I could imagine taking place in this world.

    The soundtrack is a massive victory for 2011 hey-ho culture. One star!

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  • Don't Look Up

    Don't Look Up

    ★★

    I showed my anti-vax parents this movie and they fell to their knees, thanking Jesus Christ and Adam McKay for showing them the error of their ways. They pledged to reduce their carbon emissions by 80% by 2024 and deleted their Facebook accounts on the spot.

    They agreed that our society is too distracted by celebrities and controlled by big tech, so they decided to listen to this star-studded movie on Netflix and joined the DSA, stopped using Amazon, and are dedicating the rest of their lives to fighting climate change. Thank you Adam, you are smart and righteous and a very good man!! Two stars!!

  • The Banshees of Inisherin

    The Banshees of Inisherin

    ★★★★★

    an allegory for two men ending a podcast. five stars!