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  • The Nun

    The Nun


    "What's the opposite of a miracle, Father?"

    Marilyn Manson in a habit terrorizes a bunch of nuns.

    I liked the atmosphere. The acting was good. There's nothing great here, but I've definitely seen worse.

    It has way too many (!!LOUD NOISES!!) jump scares. After a while, the audience began laughing at them.

    The Nun abuses some elements (jump scares) while not utilizing others to their full extent (the bobblehead-nurse-like nuns that crack when they move).

    This was better than I expected, but I also had really, really low expectations. Take that as you will.

  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows

    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows


    The first movie sucked.

    "What would Vin Diesel do? No regrets, no fear."

    This one's even worse.

    "Can you smell what this Rock is cooking?"

    Painful. Just absolutely painful.

Popular reviews

  • The Thing

    The Thing


    This is one of my favorite films ever. It is the perfect blend of sci-fi and horror. The special effects are so well done that even decades later they remain a disturbing sight; modern movies should watch The Thing and weep in shame.

    The characters, the paranoia, the sense of claustrophobic doom, it's all brilliantly done.

    I watched this movie when I was decently young, so it holds a special place in my heart as being one of the few films that ever managed to scare me.

  • Army of Darkness

    Army of Darkness


    Just found my MGM Region 3 Director's Cut buried in a pile of DVDs. Groovy.

    The movie is 93 minutes long with some alternate takes and the original ending. It's awesome, though I do miss "Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun."

    Army of Darkness is a ridiculous, campy, over-the-top slapstick comedy in which the goofy Ash manages to make life a lot more difficult for everyone he meets. There really is nothing like a Bruce Campbell one-liner.