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  • Marauders

    Marauders

    "I guess the Feds can be as slow and inefficient as the cops."

    Long, boring, convoluted. I get what happened and all, but 1. it feels like the movie presented it really poorly, and 2. by the end, I just didn't care.

    Also, the cancer wife thing is weird and just added another item to the list of shit I didn't care about.

  • Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

    Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

    ★★

    "Do you want to know what killed me?"

    Meh.

    I just did not connect with any of the characters, which had me feeling every second of this movie's 127 minutes.

    Like Fox's X-Men movies, these characters are mostly defined by their powers. Some of them have interesting powers, but none have interesting personalities. Jacob says he's an outsider, but we never experience it, and the kids are kept safe from social ostracism in their little bubble, so the movie never…

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  • The Thing

    The Thing

    ★★★★★

    This is one of my favorite films ever. It is the perfect blend of sci-fi and horror. The special effects are so well done that even decades later they remain a disturbing sight; modern movies should watch The Thing and weep in shame.

    The characters, the paranoia, the sense of claustrophobic doom, it's all brilliantly done.

    I watched this movie when I was decently young, so it holds a special place in my heart as being one of the few films that ever managed to scare me.

  • Army of Darkness

    Army of Darkness

    ★★★★

    Just found my MGM Region 3 Director's Cut buried in a pile of DVDs. Groovy.

    The movie is 93 minutes long with some alternate takes and the original ending. It's awesome, though I do miss "Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun."

    Army of Darkness is a ridiculous, campy, over-the-top slapstick comedy in which the goofy Ash manages to make life a lot more difficult for everyone he meets. There really is nothing like a Bruce Campbell one-liner.