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  • Wonder Woman

    Wonder Woman

    ★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    "We're headed to the front. We're probably going to die. This is a terrible idea!"

    Well, I didn't find Chris Pine as douchey as I usually do. Of course, he gets most of the good lines. He plays the more-interesting-than-the-main-character love interest.

    There are no character arcs in this. No one grows. No one overcomes any personal demons. Diana starts the movie believing in humanity, and she ends the movie with the same, if slightly more complicated, belief. Steve doesn't…

  • Small Crimes

    Small Crimes

    ★★½

    Joe Denton... Wow, what a fuck up. He is just terrible at everything.

    Small Crimes can feel rather long, but it has entertaining moments. Overall, it needs more Gary Cole.

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  • The Thing

    The Thing

    ★★★★★

    This is one of my favorite films ever. It is the perfect blend of sci-fi and horror. The special effects are so well done that even decades later they remain a disturbing sight; modern movies should watch The Thing and weep in shame.

    The characters, the paranoia, the sense of claustrophobic doom, it's all brilliantly done.

    I watched this movie when I was decently young, so it holds a special place in my heart as being one of the few films that ever managed to scare me.

  • Army of Darkness

    Army of Darkness

    ★★★★

    Just found my MGM Region 3 Director's Cut buried in a pile of DVDs. Groovy.

    The movie is 93 minutes long with some alternate takes and the original ending. It's awesome, though I do miss "Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun."

    Army of Darkness is a ridiculous, campy, over-the-top slapstick comedy in which the goofy Ash manages to make life a lot more difficult for everyone he meets. There really is nothing like a Bruce Campbell one-liner.