This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Cam Wade’s review published on Letterboxd:
This review may contain spoilers.
The first time I watched Mulholland Drive, I wasn't a huge film fan like I am today. I loved Twin Peaks, and a few other Lynch films I saw, but I wasn't good at breaking apart and analysing films. I liked it, but I was confused, and I hated that I didn't know the answers.
The second time I watched it, I adored it. I got everything that was happening, and I watched it with my brother who had a reaction similar to mine the first time I watched it. It was nice to see my first-time confusion mirrored onto my brother.
The third time I watched it, June of 2018, I showed it to my sister. Again, she had a similar reaction to me and my brother. As the credits rolled, she said "...Well that was a fucking masterpiece.". On that watch, not only did I completely get everything that was going on, I found it to be a truly twisted and horrifying piece of cinema.
However, my taste had still not developed at that time, but I would say for sure that it has now. I watched Mulholland Drive last night, for the first time in nearly 2 years, and I see this film in such a different light, even if it was in my top 5 favourite films before.
Yes, Mulholland Drive is disturbing. It's frightening, upsetting, and hard to watch at times, especially on a rewatch. However, this time, I saw the real beauty of it. Betty and Rita's romance, although not real, really got to me, and made me realise how brutally heartbreaking the whole "dream" is. We're witnessing a woman's idea of a better life, one where she can achieve anything and everything; a promising acting career, an amazing apartment in a fairly tale city, the admiration and care of everyone she meets, and, of course, the girl she loves. But even though the dream is about everything Diane wants, and it can appear quite selfish and narcissistic, she still wants to help people, even in her fantasies. I don't know if this is a reflection of her in real life, or if that's the person she truly wants to be.
The cinematography is also something I admired more on a rewatch. The blues, and how dirty and moody they are, much like Lynch's film Blue Velvet. The close ups of eyes, especially when Adam Kesher is staring at Betty, desperate to cast her. It's this what Diane needs; she wants to be needed, but more importantly, she needs to wanted. Even if it's brief, and not possible, someone wanting her is all Diane wants, and it breaks my heart that everybody lets her down in some way.
Dreams have always been such an exciting and thrilling thing for me. Going to sleep, being somebody else for a while, in a setting familiar yet unfamiliar to you. It's quite amazing, but then I remember people have nightmares, and then I start to feel scared that perhaps that same thing will happen to me that night. Dreams can either be amazing or terrifying, and I think that's exactly what this film is. Going to sleep and dreaming what you want to is a thrilling and exciting experience, but what happens when you wake up? All those things you want have faded away, and a not so beautiful reality is there for you. Despite this, Mulholland Drive really is beautiful.