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You were narrating again.

Pixar really missed a trick here, we’re literally at a point where we’re doing movies within movies, that’s how expansive this universe has become. Lightyear could’ve gone in so many distinctive directions, yet we landed on something childish and criminally uncreative. It was a far cry from the heights of Toy Story’s leading edge concepts, humour and characterisation.

Hear me out, I have an idea. This was Andy’s favourite movie, right? (God knows why). The credits start rolling, the camera pans out to unveil a cinema screening in the 90’s. We see Andy (Woody on his lap), Molly and his Mum. Andy’s in awe with what he’s just seen, overcome with excitement he instantly becomes infatuated with all things ‘space adventure’. A post-credit advert comes on promoting the Buzz Lightyear action-figure at Al’s Toy Barn, his Mum says that he’ll have to wait for his birthday to get one. A quote from the advert says “your new favourite toy”, we then get a close-up of Woody narrowing his eyes and clenching his fist in anger. Maybe that particular idea encourages a few plot holes, I’m just spitballing here, but you get the jist of what I’m trying to say, the opportunity for something magical was there, but the delivery wasn’t.

Lightyear was a sci-fi action-adventure and the definitive origin story of Buzz Lightyear. After he and his crew are marooned on a hostile planet millions of miles from Earth. Buzz tries to find a way home through space and time, he’s joined by a group of ambitious recruits. Complicating matters and threatening the mission is Zurg, an imposing presence with an army of ruthless robots with a mysterious agenda.

Where do I even begin? The trailer didn’t put me in good faith, and I can confirm that it was in-fact extremely boring, horribly written and creatively vulgar - A generic shovel of space garbage. I have to question Andy’s taste level, why would you want a Buzz Lightyear when you could have Sox? Moving on, the animation was great, but in this day and age that’s not something to rely on too heavily. What it lacked was those core ingredients, a solid plot, great dialogue, engaging characters and invigorating new ideas. Children won’t fall in love with this.