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  • The Christmas Chronicles

    The Christmas Chronicles

    ★★★

    Kurt Russell is a great Santa.
    "What about the rest of the film?"
    His musical number is really entertaining!
    "Mark? Mark!"
    Ooh, boy, that Kurt Russell. He's great.

  • Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

    Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

    ★★★★½

    (taps the mic)

    Hello? Hi, yes, please. I would like a feature-length movie of black-and-white animated Spider-Man Noir, starring Nicolas Cage. Now please. Ta.

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  • The Hunchback of Notre Dame II

    The Hunchback of Notre Dame II

    Bellshit.

  • Ghostbusters

    Ghostbusters

    ★★★★

    Hey, guess what? It's nothing like the trailers. It's actually funny, actually scary, and, because there isn't a bottom half to read under a movie, it's 100% dickhead proof.

    The one thing that nobody seemed to actually buy ahead of this was that it could be both a remake and a passing of the torch. It turns out that it's both of those things and while it certainly bows to the original as much as, say, The Force Awakens does…