• All Over Me

    All Over Me

    ★★★

    So the review I have up for this is totally sufficient if you just wanted a few things to recommend the movie as a 90s queer coming-of-age but I didn't previously feel up to talking about what it meant to me.

    The circumstances of this movie was my bestie had a VHS copy and loaned it to me for an indefinite period of time. I suspect this was one of her favorites to watch before sleeping (and she had a…

  • Return from Witch Mountain

    Return from Witch Mountain

    ★★★★★

    There is something very odd about this movie, an oddness scratching the inside of my head. But I can't really explain my unease? The movie feels almost abandoned/ unsupervised?

    Or just ... Christopher Lee is somehow creepier here than any horror movie I've seen? And Bette Davis foreshadows her appearance in Watcher where it's not ...

    you can't quite say 'what's Bette Davis doing in this?' Because there's a weird melancholy to watcher despite my utter bafflement at the changes…

  • How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

    How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

    ★★★

    I love how this movie thinks the absolute worst thing you can do in a relationship is start belting out Carly Simon then insist on singing the entire song, ignoring any and all social cues that it's no longer cute? That is probably just a Tuesday for me which explains ...so many things

    When I was 20, I found a copy of the rules at a garage sale and it really messed me up. Like my ex did genuinely horrifying…

  • Night of the Axe

    Night of the Axe

    ★★★★★

    Trying to revive my modern horror Mondays with this love letter to low budget shot on video slashers of the 80s and 90s which, I have seen so very many of. You have no idea.

    There is a maybe five-minute or so interlude where the killer stares at the house, party in full swing, everything is a deep blue with lights of other houses in the distance. It's beautiful and surprisingly meditative and a scene a little bit later was…

  • Faust

    Faust

    ★★★★★

    💀The🕯Horror🐈‍⬛of🦇Marna 🌕Larsen's🐺Moldy🕷Oldie🕸pre🐦‍⬛60s🦉screams

    Murnau I've told you how I feel about scary skeleton horses!

    Likely, the trauma can be traced back to Disney's Halloween Treat's showing Night On Bald Mountain to a literal three year old or whenever it was I first saw that episode of the wonderful world of Disney beamed in from Canada to our old rabbit eared TV ...

    I don't know if I want that house to look exactly like that house ...

    Or nothing like that…

  • Crimes of the Future

    Crimes of the Future

    ★★★★★

    CW: self harm

    Well, unsurprisingly, typing without an e key, touching the little plastic tube until it appears on my screen, was easier to learn than using the weird ergonomic keyboard with the gap between the g and h. What is that there for? I cannot abide it.

    I am not sure I have the emotional energy to equate KStew's epiphany to my own experiences with cutting.

    A lot of people in the writing community ask each other: what are…

  • Antlers

    Antlers

    ★★★

    Writers wishing to be politically neutral in horror will argue in favor of the f slur in modern media because 'that's how kids talk' then write a line like 'I don't take apologies from pussies' completely seriously

  • The Wretched

    The Wretched

    ★★★

    I mean what happens if the new hipster cool millnnialxennial version of the nuclear family is still the absolute worst, most boring existence ever, and it's not what you singed up for, and you just want to be naked, screaming, tits out at burning man wearing some sort of probably horribly misappropriating 'cultural' garb purchased from the mall of america's Urban Outfitters??

    But unfortunately, you already moved to the foreclosed home locals without web design skills couldn't keep paying on…

  • Island of Lost Souls

    Island of Lost Souls

    ★★★★★

    The Horror of Marna Larsen with🕯Moldy💀Oldie🦇 Horror

    I read the book but don't really remember anything other than how awful the vivisection scenes were, to where I couldn't keep reading them at work and keep from having a panic attack, something I didn't think I would have to worry about with a book that old.

    This version, unlike the awful 1970's one, there are a lot of moments that approach that horror, especially the house of pain sequence and when…

  • Disenchanted

    Disenchanted

    ★★★

    Well I cried at this ... movie ??

    So I think I've finally accepted that I'm doomed

    (ok but I'm happy she got to have all those cores for a few years at least so she doesn't look quite so weird.)

  • Mark of the Witch

    Mark of the Witch

    ★★★★★

    🦉The🌘Horror🐈‍⬛of Marna🕯Larsen💀Presents: horror classics

    Second time watch

    The message I'm trying to get out to everyone, even my fifteen remaining readers on letterboxd is: I need to keep my wretched social media undead-ish long enough to get published. And since that's not photos anymore, everything is a video now. Already, people are annoyed but I don't care because I didn't actually care about being on social media in the first place

    Witch is why i didn't just post this in…

  • Tuff Turf

    Tuff Turf

    ★★★

    I had this screaming conversation with James spader in the middle of this that he fucking better not have given the girl he is clearly gonna dump back into the gutter when he's done with her a copy of On The Road and I drunkenly googled 'what book does James spader give Frankie in Tuff Turf'

    and ... !!!

    But like even James spader in this movie is never gonna be on the road unless it's on his 500 dollar…