Favorite films

  • Laura
  • Speed
  • The Lady Vanishes
  • Tokyo Drifter

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  • Jawan

    ★★★★

  • A Haunting in Venice

    ★★★½

  • The Equalizer 2

    ★★★

  • Pathaan

    ★★★★

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  • The Day the Earth Froze

    The Day the Earth Froze

    ★★★★

    My Finnish grandmother died of cancer far too young a couple of years before I was born. She is transcendently beloved for my older siblings. She is so very alive in their hearts and memory. I have never had a presence like that in my life, and as a child I leapt at any bit of her memory anyone described.

    My Finnish great-grandmother, also beloved, died of the same cancer within weeks of my grandmother.

    I would hear little things…

  • The Lake House

    The Lake House

    ★★★★★

    The Lake House Drinking Game

    Sip:
    1) Keanu talks to an inanimate object
    2) Unnecessarily dramatic camera angle
    3) Sandra wears capris
    4) Keanu wears a blazer over a t-shirt/hoodie/turtleneck
    5) Anyone wears a turtleneck
    6) You recognize an outfit you wore in 2006
    7) They sit/stand/walk in the same spot the other has just been
    8) Keanu is earnest*

    Gulp/Finish the Drink:
    1) Keanu cries
    2) Someone says, "It's about waiting."

    *only if you want to get drunk

Recent reviews

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  • Jawan

    Jawan

    ★★★★

    Paul yelped out loud when [redacted] appeared on screen 90 minutes in to wrestle with SRK in the rain, and that was very gratifying because that was exactly my response when I saw it first too.

  • A Haunting in Venice

    A Haunting in Venice

    ★★★½

    The setting, unimpeachable! Give me a darkly lit palazzo on a stormy night and I am satisfied!

    The script, impeachable! Alas.

    It did not fully work, but I had a nice Sunday matinee and I did cry at the end so who I am to argue.

    Michelle Yeoh, the queen as ever. Having a good and freaky time.

    For those of you who have been tracking, Jamie Dornan again sang in a film (for about 15 seconds but we're counting…

Popular reviews

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  • Just Like Heaven

    Just Like Heaven

    ★★★★

    Remember that time in the early 2000s when Mark Ruffalo was the go-to guy for high-concept romantic comedies? What a time to be alive.

  • Barbarian

    Barbarian

    ½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    1) I deeply apologize Malakie for suggesting we watch this.

    2) I cannot believe they BillSkarsgård-baited me only to quickly smash his head to bits.

    3) I paid for a Bill Skarsgård is sinister movie, not a Justin Long is unendurable movie.

    4) I cannot believe in the year of our lord 2022 we are making horror films in which the most brutal death was reserved for Andre, a Black homeless man who helps the lead only to be torn…