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  • A Quiet Place

    A Quiet Place

    ★½

    Ho. Lee. Fuck. What an uninspired shitshow. A tonally disconnected, ill conceived and exhaustive tension building gimmick. Bordered into accidental camp. I was cackling! Also, for a married couple irl, John Krasinski and Emily Blunt had little to none on-screen chemistry. And, I cracked the Krasinski code of filmmaking. JJ Abrams attempts to channel Steven Spielberg and John Kransinski attempts to emulate JJ Abrams. Thank you, and good night.

  • Phantom Thread

    Phantom Thread

    ★★★★★

    So, I saw Phantom Thread a third time last night. This is Paul Thomas Anderson shooting for modern-day Kubrick, not just heavily influenced by like Punch-Drunk Love, but he ends up going so far beyond that by retaining his usual own singular sense of self. Probably best described as a deceptively savory treat, but one that contains a deviously tart filling. Effortlessly oscillating between tones and coddled together by a next-level great Jonny Greenwood score. So fiendishly nasty, intensely romantic,…

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  • It Follows

    It Follows

    ★★★★½

    I now present you with John Carpenter's The Spectacular Now!

  • Foxcatcher

    Foxcatcher

    ★★★★★

    Most of my friends will call me Eagle, or Golden Eagle.

    In an Oscar drama that will give you wet dream-like nightmares, Foxcatcher is an immaculate, intimate, intriguing, and chilling piece of filmmaking that goes far beyond the stretch of moviemaking you'd expect from a Steve Carell and Channing Tatum starring vehicle. The story here is fascinating. Here you have a crazy, talentless, rich and entitled old coot who is leading America’s wrestling team at his Foxcatcher estate to basically…