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  • Deadcon

    Deadcon

    ½

    It started off halfway decent and snowballed, by the end my brains were practically leaking out of my ears and I was knee deep in the most uninspired, stupid, unoriginal, throw-whatever-at-the-wall-and-see-what-sticks, mind-numbingly dull pissant failure of a grade school film produced by adults with the mental capacity of a stick of butter. 

    Okay, I admit I was a little mean. Being mean is like the funnest part of watching a bad movie— so just let me have at least that.…

  • Swiss Army Man

    Swiss Army Man

    ★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    This movie had been on my watchlist on Netflix for a long, loooong time before I decided to watch it. I avoided it because I assumed it would be some kind of dramatic heartthrob that would end up making me cry. Boy, I couldn’t have possibly been more wrong.

    The whole story can be up to interpretation, but I like this explanation the best: Hank discovers his extremely repressed impulsive side of himself in the form of a corpse who…

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  • Joker

    Joker

    ★★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Joker blew my mind. Every single scene Joaquin Phoenix was in left me speechless, and I was completely infatuated with the character he played during the duration of the movie (which isn’t an easy feat because I have a short attention span and the movie was 2 hours long) 

    Todd Phillips, the director, did a wonderful job of portraying the incredibly gritty, sinister, and often two-faced world of Gotham. Nowhere in the city did life ever seem as happy go…

  • Saw 3D

    Saw 3D

    ★★★

    I don't understand why some consider this to be the worst, I thought it was one of the better ones. The first game in the beginning was especially vicious seeing how everybody just watched it happen. I got what I wanted out of this movie, I got fucked up, bloody and disgusting games.

    The series as a whole was very entertaining to say the least. And John Kramer will live on as a terrifying force to be reckoned with in horror film history.