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  • Dracula

    Dracula

    ★★★★★

    keanu reeves gets his nipples sucked by vampire monica belluci

  • Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

    Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

    ★★½

    cho chang is such a complex and fascinating character, an asian person wouldn’t have written her any better as they would not understand the POC experience as well as JK rowling

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  • The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl

    The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl

    ★★★★★

    "Are you ready for your movie lessons?"

    Seven Samurai gulped.

    Vertigo shivered.

    Citizen Kane shuddered.

    The Godfather blinked nervously.

    "yes, The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl" they said in unision

  • Portrait of a Lady on Fire

    Portrait of a Lady on Fire

    ★★★★★

    what is the point of making movies anymore