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  • The Great Dictator

    The Great Dictator

    Let this be a warning...

    Copy a man’s distinctive style of facial hair and there’ll be hell to pay. He’ll make you look like a damn fool. 

    You can kill millions, try to take over the world, be an all-around dick; just don’t ripoff another dude’s moustache. It ain’t cool.

  • Paper Moon

    Paper Moon

    Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Goldilocks, who went for a long walk in the woods. She came across an old repertory theatre playing the films of Peter Bogdanovich...

    First, she watched The Last Picture Show

    "This movie is too sad!” she said. 

    Later, she watched What's Up, Doc?

    "This movie’s too funny!” she said. 

    Finally, she watched Paper Moon

    "Ahh, this movie is just right.”

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  • Crash

    Crash

    I use to be really racist. But then I saw this movie, and now I'm not racist anymore.

    If you don't wanna be racist, you should watch it too.

    Just make sure you see this particular movie and not the other Crash by David Cronenberg. That one just makes you really kinky.

  • To Die For

    To Die For

    Once, when I was eighteen, I ate a sandwich too quickly and developed a horrible case of the hiccups. Ridding myself of the condition wasn't usually a problem, but this particular case was troublesome as none of my usual tricks (e.g., eating peanut butter, holding my breath, tiny sips of water) were proving effective.

    Twenty-four hours later, with still no change, I grew worried and sought medical advice. A doctor (probably suspecting my case as psychosomatic) prescribed me some very…