Not scary. Incoherent. Sloppily edited. Poorly acted. Lacks any suspense. How is this from the same guy that directed “Let The Right One In” and “Tinker, Tailer, Soldier, Spy!?”

Wide angles, steadicams, odd angled close ups, open heart surgery, masturbation, dark humor, arm biting, finger sucking, classical crescendos, fully naked Kidman and Farrell, eye bleeding, zoom in’s, metaphors, Ellie Goulding and not a single deer!

If you’ve seen one Woody Allen film, you’ve almost seen them all. Self indulgent in his writing, characters that are unraveling and a kid who can’t stop himself from lighting things on fire, “Wonder Wheel” may be the most beautiful film he’s ever shot (Courtesy of Vittorio Storaro) but it won’t win him any new fans.

Give Roger Deakins the Oscar for cinematography now!!!! Seriously, this film is a technically breathtaking on all levels and has an ever deeper story than the original. The only thing people may take issue with is the slow and deliberate editing which I didn’t mind as it allowed me to focus more on the story, themes and technical wizardry on display.

Check out my full review on NextBestPicture.com