RSS feed for Noah

Favorite films

Recent activity


Recent reviews

  • The Lion King

    The Lion King


    If you're hungry for a hunk of fat and juicy meat,
    Eat my buddy Pumbaa here because he is a treat.
    Come on down and dine
    On this tasty swine
    All you have to do is get in line.
    Aaaare you achin'
    (Yup, yup, yup)
    Foooor some bacon?
    (Yup, yup, yup)
    Heeee's a big pig
    (Yup, yup)
    You could be a big pig too.

  • Ant-Man



    (Countdown to Infinity War, Week 11)

    Let's get one thing straight: Ant-Man directed by Peyton Reed is very good. Ant-Man directed by Edgar Wright would've probably been ten times better.

    Even in the wake of that unfortunate director shift, Reed, Rudd and company do a fine job of picking up the pieces and gluing them back together again, even if the cracks are still noticeable. Rudd's a great leading man, the script credited to him, Wright, Adam McKay and Joe…

Popular reviews

  • Star Trek Beyond

    Star Trek Beyond


    "You gave your girlfriend a tracking device?"

  • X-Men: Apocalypse

    X-Men: Apocalypse


    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    My first rewatch, and I noticed the bigger flaws a lot more than when I saw it back in June.

    It's too darn long and unfocused. It takes a good hour for the ball to really get rolling, after cutting from location to location, plot point to plot point, character to character, and that's not good. The remaining hour sends the film down generic superhero movie climax lane, with cities being destroyed and super punches and all that jazz.