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  • Angst



    Never neglect mustard when you're dipping sausage, brat, or hot dog.

    I really did not need yet another film about a killer who must kill to get sexually aroused, with us being forced see him quivering over bodies, touching himself, pulling his pants down- etc.

    I did, however, very much need to see a film about a home invasion, murder spree where the family dog is treated with this much respect throughout. Since this dog is present for every horrible…

  • Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives

    Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives


    After The Final Chapter, this might be the most borderline incomprehensibly devised Friday the 13th when it comes to character dialogue. Wait, strike that: Chapter is just fucking stupid- bad writers and directors could have avoided making those mistakes. This film is incomprehensible.

    I talked about that in my 2013 writeup but it bares some repeating. This sequel is damn smart in terms of plotting, meta value, and spatial relations between Jason and his intended victims. It was ahead of…

Popular reviews

  • Sleepaway Camp

    Sleepaway Camp

    This review was written in 2011, I believe:

    How many times is a rip-off able to surpass the thing it owes its' existence to? Only two films come to mind (Piranha is the other). Friday the 13th had great pieces but really didn't come together to be the best it could be (though it's still a personal favorite and always will be). Sleepaway Camp aims lower but nonetheless passes with Sleaze Honors. In the arena of so-bad-it's-good horror movies -…

  • Jurassic Park

    Jurassic Park


    #63 in my 99 90's Movies month.

    Excitement and danger come first, characters come second. Which is totally okay in Spielbergia. Though those kids are incredibly annoying at times. ("Vegiesaurus! Meatasaurus!" ...Really, movie?) And some of the drama is pretty seriously forced down your throat (Laura Dern before eating the ice cream, Attenborough's super-scream on the telephone, Jeff Goldblum... in general, that kid and the tree climbing, and the fence jumping). But it is exciting and it never did skimp on the danger, did it? Holds up surprisingly well. I probably never enjoyed it this much.