Sleepwalkers ★★★½

I shouldn't even be talking about this because this isn't a real movie.

In a real horror movie, there's typically a scary/unsettling opening, then it establishes the setting (the "normal world"), and then it slowly introduces the horrifying threat that will shake up that normal world.

In Sleepwalkers, there's a pretty standard cold open, which is then followed by a mother/son duo of shapeshifting cat people fucking so hard (offscreen) their room turns neon purple, then Madchen Amick is introduced via a dance number in a movie theatre lobby, and so and so forth and at no point does this cinematic bastard even consider slowing down and trying to be "normal."

Stephen King literally wrote a movie only he would enjoy, and it is quite a sight to behold. Extremely goofy, extremely weird, and most importantly, never boring. This is perfect 3AM creature feature fluff, and if you happen to have some illicit substances at your disposal, now is the time to break that shit out.

"COP KABOB!!!!!!"


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