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  • Johnny Mnemonic

    Johnny Mnemonic

    Even worse than I remembered. I wouldn’t fault anyone for thinking Keanu Reeves is just some random dude they grabbed off the street five minutes before they started shooting. He’s THAT bad. 

    On the other hand, we get about six glorious minutes of a deranged Full-On-Born-Again-Christian Dolph Lundgren. I’m not saying more Lundgren would’ve saved the movie, but it would’ve made it easier to watch. More laser whips would’ve helped too. 

    Truly convinced you needed to be way into cyberpunk…

  • The Favourite

    The Favourite

    ★★★

    Women. 

    They be catty.

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  • Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

    Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

    ½

    Offensively bad. 

    I weep for the future of comic book movies and comic book fans if THIS is considered one of the best comic book movies now. 

    Did the filmmakers even read any Spider-man comics? Watch any Spider-man movies?

    Ok, just kidding. It was great. Not the best Spider-man movie (SPIDER-MAN 2 still holds that spot) but it might just have a slight edge over HOMECOMING. 

    I’ll change the star rating to 4.5 in a few hours, after my friends have all freaked out.

  • Hereditary

    Hereditary

    ★★

    It’s not you, movie. It’s me. I just can’t take the kind of stuff that happens in your second half as seriously as you need me to. 

    Well, maybe it’s a little you, movie. Because your first half is a heart-wrenching portrayal of grief and tragedy and you let me down with the follow-up. And Toni Collette gives her all for over two hours and I kind of resent the silliness you put her through during the third act.

    An extra half a star for what might be the most HOLY SHIT moment of 2018.