I didn't expect this to be a stoner comedy? Those Hollyweird execs sure got their withered nubs on the PULSE of middle school America at the turn of the 2000s!

Idle Hands also features a cameo from Tom DeLonge as a fast food cashier and The Offspring playing "I Wanna Be Sedated" (kill me) at a Halloween themed school dance, which is about as peak tween PTSD flashback as you can get! I knew better even then to shut "Pretty…

After watching Jawbreaker in a theater earlier this week, I decided to fill in some late '90s teen blind spots and (maybe wrongheadedly) slide down a middle school wormhole where JNCOs, spiked hair, earth tones, dark makeup, suede jackets, sweaters with one stripe across the chest, open plaid button-ups, and goggles were IN.

Booooooooy did this give me some awkward 11-year-old PTSD! I remember writing off Can't Hardly Wait and Varsity Blues and Idle Hands and all those teen movies…

If I see another handheld shaky cam pinned behind a nervous woman as she tromps through a confined space, I'm gonna SCREAM.

mother! (ugh that pretentious unnecessary lowercase and punctuation) feels like a acidic treatise on the dickhead self-absorbed artistes some naive hero worshippers fall for. Too bad there's a bunch of silly nonsense Biblical imagery of false idols and firstborns and bickering sons to make this movie seem DEEP, man. Gimme a break, Aronofsky. The whole movie plays like…