• The Clovehitch Killer

    The Clovehitch Killer

    ★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    While I didn’t intentionally design a double bill, this is actually quite a nice follow up after my last film. While the last film dealt with a teenage boy dealing with the concern he might one day become a killer, only to discover there was something far more evil lurking in his small town. This is about a teenage boy who discovers his Dad might be the BTKesque killer who has been haunting his small town for decades.

    Again, I…

  • I Am Not a Serial Killer

    I Am Not a Serial Killer

    ★★★★

    So I was thinking about checking out ‘Drag Me To Hell’ next, as I heard it made a good double bill with ‘Malignant’, but since I didn’t vibe with ‘Malignant’ I figured I’d just move on.

    I hadn’t heard of this or seen any mention of this before, but this is exactly the kind of missed horror gem I was looking for. The blurb for this makes it sound like quite a different film than it really ends up being…

  • Malignant

    Malignant

    ★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    So err… has anyone made any ‘Harry Potter’ jokes yet?

    Never before has a twist been so odd, yet so utterly telegraphed from practically the opening moments of a film.

    So, real talk, this was never part of my plans originally. I’d never even heard of this and suddenly it was all anyone was talking about, so I figured I had to check this out and speak about this.

    But in what context is everyone talking about this? Because like...…

  • Sputnik

    Sputnik

    ★★

    A quick Google suggests this was made for around 2 million quid, which would mark this a blockbuster in Russia, but an indie in the States. It is with those expectations in check, that it becomes hard not to marvel at ‘Sputnik’ at times.

    From it's striking period production design, captured with such stylish, cinematic, filmic construction, this is one glossy film that seems to loom far greater than the budget would suggest. At the centre of it all is…

  • Slaxx

    Slaxx

    ★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I mean, I never thought I’d watch a film about a killer pair of jeans...

    ...But I definitely never thought I’d watch a scathing critique of modern consumerism, which features a killer pair of jeans...

    ...And I most definitely never expected it to be this good.

    I wasted pretty much my entire Saturday morning trying to find something to watch for Spooky Season. Boy am I glad I landed on this.

    — Locke.

  • Lucky

    Lucky

    ★★

    It is friday once again, this means catching up with another three modern horror movies I missed, in the name of SpoOoOoOoOky Season. I actually started with a different Shudder original, but after roughly half an hour, it wasn’t grabbing me at all. I flicked over to this instead and Shudder let me down again.

    Look, I know that if I put my foot wrong, then my poorly chosen words surrounding ‘Lucky’ will become an incendiary grenade waiting to go…

  • Censor

    Censor

    ★★

    Again, unintended, but I managed to round out my weekend on a trilogy of meandering British horror movies. This wasn't the worst, it wasn't the best, it exists somewhere in the middle. What a weak opening weekend to Spooky Season 2021. Oh well, at least this one delivered a bonkers finale. The other two films couldn't even manage that.

    Initially, 'Censor' submerges us in 1980s British Conservative moral panic. A period, whether before your time or not, that is central…

  • Caveat

    Caveat

    ★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    My plan, from now through October, is to try and do three horror films a week (Fri, Saturday and Sunday) in the name of SpOoOoky Season, so onwards we roll.

    Unintentionally, I went from one Shoestring Irish Shudder Original, straight into another. Although these two couldn’t be any more different from one another in pretty much every other regard. And honestly, I actually quite liked this, overall. It definitely feels too long, even at 90 odd minutes with credits, almost…

  • Boys from County Hell

    Boys from County Hell

    September marks the beginning of the ramping up to full on SpOoOoOoOoOoooky Season and I thought this was as good of an excuse as any to go back over some horror/genre flicks from the last couple of years I missed.

    There is no order to this, it is just at random, but like I do so often when I try these things, we kick off on a low note. This held a lot of promise on paper but in execution…

  • The Suicide Squad

    The Suicide Squad

    ★★★★★

    My biggest problem with 2016's 'Suicide Squad' was it's refusal to lean into it's central gimmick. Something it appears I am not alone in feeling.

    I went into that movie to see a team of villains be forced into saving the world, intrigued by how this would play differently to the ever increasing beigeness of the tidal wave of superhero flicks. Instead, I mostly left that film feeling like I was being told off. No fun allowed, it informed me,…

  • Psycho Goreman

    Psycho Goreman

    ★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I really wanted to like this. It had lots of things going for it that I really appreciated. But in the end... this really was just kinda shit, honestly.

    For much of it's running time, whether intentional or not, this almost perfectly captures the experience of watching a bad English adaptation of a much better tokusatsu production, likely from Japan. The clearly darker, much more interesting, tokusatsu portions here are smothered by insufferable child actors, dumb adult characters and odd…

  • Nobody

    Nobody

    ★★★★★

    It’d be easy for me to be critical of ‘Nobody’ - a film without basically a single original idea. Although action movies like this existed long before ‘John Wick’, guys, you know this, right? With the millions of references to it across reviews of so many action movies, is ‘John Wick’ now the ‘Dark Souls’ equivalent for movies?

    Sorry. Tangent.

    Where was I?

    Right.

    I started there because I was watching ‘Gunpowder Milkshake’ yesterday - another movie with basically no…