Little Women ★★½

(takes a sip of my bottle of sprite)
Fearful I was missing something, I watched Little Women a second time and I liked it... less.
(notices mob advancing)
My female wife also didn’t like it!
(shatters sprite bottle against wall, holds glass at arm’s length for protection)
I liked the Winona Ryder one!
(whips glass to and fro but it is knocked from my hand, leaving me defenseless)
(turns and runs away. as I run, my loose pants fall around my ankles, exposing my bare bottom)