They/Them ★½

All of the 1,5 stars are for the actors, who truly did their best. And, hey, it doesn't look that bad. Anyway that's all you're getting when you watch this movie

It's rare to see a plot this unconcerned with causality – nearly everything seems to happen because a person randomly wanders somewhere or decides to do something for no reason. The main characters are completely passive observers who kind of just stare at the increasingly unnerving conversion camp activities happening around them and sometimes claim a tiny moral victory by being passive-aggressive about it. When they finally make a plan to escape and it looks like something is actually gonna happen, the murders derail the entire thing. Seriously, the main characters just straight up don't do anything in this movie. If the screenwriter asked me for feedback I guess I would have to be like I dunno, maybe it should be a story instead of a series of vaguely connected anecdotes about scary things that could occur at a conversion camp?

Luckily, to distract you from how bad the script is, the movie is also ideologically confused. My expectations were low going in to the climax, but what I did not anticipate was that the movie would pull a contrived moral conflict out of its ass just for the purpose of taking a meaningless centrist position on – you guessed it right – conversion camps. If you're so afraid to have a real opinion on something, maybe just don't make a movie about it?

They/Them is a complete waste of its pretty funny title, and the description "LGBTQIA+ empowerment tale" is a fat fucking lie. Or maybe the empowering part was meant to be the sudden, tonally baffling musical number. At least the theater kids they cast in this movie looked like they were having fun.

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