• Close-Up

    Close-Up

    ★★★½

    I think I’m either too mean or too dumb to get this movie. The mechanism is fascinating, but I never became invested in the principles in the way that so many have.

  • Con Air

    Con Air

    ★★★★

    Talk about star studded cast!! I’m a forever faithful Nic Cage fan, but his performance here really takes a backseat to the over-the-top baddie played by John Malkovich, and even to the earnest 90’s action heroics of John Cusack, who gives some of the movies best laughs as well. A perfect confection of e plodding cars and grimy, greased up action. Love. 💥💥

  • Ghostbusters: Afterlife

    Ghostbusters: Afterlife

    ★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Minus all the stars for hologram Harold Ramis 🙁🙁🙁

  • Jack Frost

    Jack Frost

    Thought this was the scary Jack Frost and waited till the last moments of this corny shot for when the snowman was gonna start killing people. He never killed a single person 0/5.

  • Dredd

    Dredd

    ★★½

    What that mouth do (answer: go like this ☹️☹️☹️)

  • Pig

    Pig

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Only Nicolas Cage could/would make a Babette’s Feast/John Wick mashup. And at a tight, efficient 90 minutes!! A perfect movie. What a fucking icon.

  • The Strange Color of Your Body's Tears

    The Strange Color of Your Body's Tears

    ★★

    This movie went so far up its own ass that Gaspar Noe did a twenty minute continuous take of the journey. Pretty though.

  • Diner

    Diner

    ★★★

    Are straight ppl ok????

  • Maniac

    Maniac

    ★★★★

    I’ll be Joe Spinnell’s mommy 💦💦💦

  • Space Jam: A New Legacy

    Space Jam: A New Legacy

    ½

    Praying for the souls of the Warner Brothers IP’s who appeared in this. 🙏🙏🙏

  • The Taking of Deborah Logan

    The Taking of Deborah Logan

    ★★★

    -formulaic horror, elevated slightly by two interesting central performances
    -please stop making found footage unless there’s a cloverfield monster to vlog 
    -lesbians are sad and brave and good at everything

  • Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

    Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

    ★★½

    Not as charmingly kooky as the first installment (why no jelly bean martinis?? what did we do to have those revoked???) and with continuity errors that made me actually scream, but still with a bunch of great Nic Cage moments. Highlight is when he shoos away the imaginary bee. A master.