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  • The Valet

    The Valet

    ★★½

    I could have sworn I saw this when it came out, but I think I'm thinking of that Vanessa Paradis movie Priceless. I kind of wish I'd watched that instead; this has some good performances, especially by Gad Elmaleh, but it's undercooked. It's a rom-com in which no one falls in love; the one character who is presumably already in love realizes this when the object of her affection lies to her, makes her jealous, and offers her money. SUPER…

  • The Lego Batman Movie

    The Lego Batman Movie

    ★★★★½

    I think I loved Zach Galifinakis's vocal performance even more this time.

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  • The Suckling

    The Suckling

    ★★★½

    Some elements of this are hilariously bad (most of the acting and dialogue, some of the camera work), while others are really impressive for a movie of any budget (the creature effects!). I'm tempted to say the creature effects are TOO good for this film, but there are a few moments of creative insanity that actually bring the film up to the level of the special effects, however briefly.

    Mostly this movie made me laugh at our ideas about what…

  • Annabelle

    Annabelle

    ★½

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    If you, like me, are looking forward to Annabelle: Creation and think it would be a good idea to catch up on the original before seeing the prequel in theaters, please consider being smarter than me and not doing that. There was never a GOOD time in our nation's history to end a movie with a wise old black lady sacrificing herself for a young beautiful white mom -- my notes here are literally "NOOOO ALFRE WOODARD THIS IS NOT…