F9 ★★

It used to be a running joke. "The only thing left for the Fast and Furious franchise to do is go to space." But Vin Diesel and Justin Lin apparently took it as a dare, so in F9: The Fast Saga, that's exactly what happens. Tej and Roman put on make-shift astronaut suits, strap into a car that the Tokyo Drift guys attached rocket boosters to, and blast themselves into orbit to intercept a satellite. Is it stupid? Oh, yeah, it's stupid. But, then again, a lot of things in this franchise have been stupid — amnesia plotlines, zombie cars, screwy timelines — yet somehow those things only added to the endearing nature of this loud, melodramatic soap opera we call the Fast & Furious films. Sadly, though, Dominic Toretto has finally been chased down by an opponent he can't beat: the law of diminishing returns. It turns out, Tej and Roman going to space isn't affectionately stupid. It's just plain stupid. And I'm sorry to report that's a fair assessment of the movie as a whole.

You can read my full review of this movie at Cult Spark.

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