the defining film of the 21st century. we live in the absolute stupidest time in American history.
VAN DAMMAGE 003
in this one Van Damme plays a KGB agent named Andrei opposite Shō Kosugi's titular BLACK EAGLE. pretty dire stuff, ugly to look at with bad fights, but i guess there's a certain charm to a $3 million spy picture being filmed entirely on the beautiful island of Malta now that every major blockbuster is shot against some green screen behind a Georgia state highway. Van Damme does get some dimension as the villain, including a romantic…
A walking contradiction. Wants to deconstruct superhero movies in a metatextual way but sticks stringently to origin story formula; wants to appeal to a teenage demo with its juvenile dick joke humor but is stuffed to the gills with pop references for thirtysomethings; wants to be seen as a big bad R-rated comic book film but treats violence as flippantly as a bullshit video game. It's obnoxious. It's boring. It's aesthetically revolting. And it's apparently what the people want, given that it's now the highest-grossing R-rated film of all time. We get the world we deserve.
feels less like this movie has a screenplay at times than a Bingo board full of woke signifiers to fill, the first few minutes alone presenting the sight of Michelle Obama, 'RBG', and a big RESIST sticker on a car window. but what exactly are these characters resisting? they seem to live in a near-future neoliberal utopia where the worst offense a person could commit is maybe being a lil' bit judgmental. there is zero truth or texture to this…