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  • The Alternative Miss World

    The Alternative Miss World

    ★★★★½

    came for Divine, stayed for Miss Wolverhampton Municipal Baths

    the premise of this film, set up early on, is that the attendees would be grateful for the documentation as they would be too inebriated to remember the event. a short way through i realised i needed to go and i am FUMING that it only comes by every 4 years and this year's event at the Globe theatre is already sold out!!! i would have booked tickets on the spot.…

  • Carnage: Swallowing the Past

    Carnage: Swallowing the Past

    ★★★★★

    'Children may not have eaten a dead fish staring up at them on a plate but they would definitely eat a finger recommended by a captain. Parents were charmed by characters like the Burger King, preferring to think of him as a magical king rather than someone just dressed like that to distract from the genocide.'

    The last time I stood to bear witness at an abattoir I was mildly upset and angry at the site, but it wasn't until…

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  • Possession

    Possession

    ★★★★

    i was going to ask if isabelle adjani is ok as she scared me to my core with the depth of her madness but a quick google brings up that she apparently was so traumatised by shooting this she attempted suicide right after and honestly, i can believe it

  • F*&% the Prom

    F*&% the Prom

    ★★

    it's as if the director tried to go for something stylistically ott and then chickened out, leaving a generic teen film with dozens of awkward attempts at humour that full commitment, a tighter edit and an actual score might have sold.

    also what was that camera. sack your dp. sack your cam op. sack everyone including the trainee and the gaffer for gods sake it looked Bad