NOTHING PREPARED ME FOR JEFF GOLDBLUM AS AARON
I walked out of the matinee after one hour and a half of being pummelled by this unholy nonsense. What a sluggishly paced and narratively confused fella this film was. It was kind of great to actually see the games' aesthetics get the most faithful screen adaptation, but that's just it. Everything else was a completely unengaging mess. I saw potential here - a sprawling fantasy universe that could be fun to explore. But all of that was squandered in…
Okay, so it's out and it's nice.
Wait, well, it's more than nice. It's good! Yeah? Let's settle for 'good' so as to not make these hungry dogs even hungrier. From now on, I'll be using the adjective as a euphemism for the M-word.
*EUPHEMISM METER: 100%*
George Miller. Now I've never met the man, let alone talking to him, but judging from Mad Max: Fury Road, I'm willing to bet my ass that he's a super kind guy. How…