Out of all the things I learned, struggled with, and went through in college, there's a specific moment that changed me the most. It was during my sophomore year when I had failed half my classes from the year before and given one more chance to make it work. I was, of course, depressed and didn't know it, or more accurately I refused to acknowledge it. Acknowledgement meant that there really was something wrong, and that would mean having to…
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Cowboy Bebop 1998
During the summers of my childhood when my parents would work I'd go to an older woman's house where I'd make friends with all the other kids dropped off there. It was great: we'd mess around and watch tv in the morning still half-asleep from the car-ride over before doing math problems right before lunch, then play outside in her garden and back yard before heading inside to play her college son's SNES. Every summer day for a while was…
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Alexander the Great 1980
Alexander the Great as the antihero, the revolutionary, the failure. His mythology, both revered and reviled, is reincarnated two millennia forward as an übermensch (the same übermensch as before) but cannot conquer modern battles of ideology. Instead he becomes subsumed in them, a catalyst for a change that's ultimately self-defeating. There is so much righteous anger for the failures of the government, but even a rebellious übermensch is not immune to similar failures when he transforms himself into a counter-government.…
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From Bakersfield to Mojave 2021
Something I love about Benning's works from Ruhr onwards is his insistence on lingering. Prior works contained shots that met typical expectations of shot length, the subject to be filmed either entering the frame quickly or already within and when gone so too does the film move on. This is not to say they are any lesser than his newest wave, but it was specifically their playfulness and spontaneity that defined their structuralism. New Benning sticks much closer to a…
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The Worst Person in the World 2021
We can't help but feel like the worst person in the world. Not to our friends necessarily, or our families for that matter, or even to the one(s) we share a bed with, but to ourselves. Decisions we made that we can't really call 'self-destructive', that's not quite it, but destroys our lives anyways. Destroys what we've built the last few years of our lives, and with no idea of how we'll survive after. Why do we do this to…
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