Marriage Story ★★★★★

There is no one you know how to hurt more than someone you love.

My own divorce is about to be finalised. It was not my decision to separate but I didn’t fight it. I moved out and set up again on my own. On reflection I can see the moments where things could have taken the same destructive turns as they did in Marriage Story but through some sacrifice and luck, we settled amicably outside of using lawyer or court intrusion. This was for one purpose and one purpose only – our son.

I could talk for hours about how the film perfectly captures the wretchedness of the situation. You mourn the loss of what has been taken away from you. Memories tainted and a future uncertain. The acknowledgement of change and growth, that someone has become unrecognisable to who they once were - or perhaps they are the same and you are seeing them with fresh eyes. The nuances, dependencies, expectations and reliance on each other in a relationship clouds your vision and your own identity as an individual can get lost in a mire of resentment. You strive to do your best but if it’s only on your own terms then ultimately you will fail.

The performances by Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson are truly sublime - perfectly balanced, raw and relatable. Perhaps due to my own experiences or perhaps a slight bias to the character I came out of Marriage Story understanding of Nicole but firmly more sympathetic to Charlie. I would love to know how other felt about this – is it a gender bias, subtle differences in the direction and writing or purely what or who you can relate to the most?

Cathartic, reflective, frustrating and hopeful in equal measure.