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  • Alien³

    Alien³

    I first watched this shortly after it came out on video in 1992 (possibly even on a pirated copy while it was still in cinemas). It was such a dull and disappointing end to a (then) trilogy that I didn't watch it again for 20 years. After several people assured me that it wasn't that bad and was probably better than I remembered I decided it was time to watch it again. What a mistake. This film is 173 hours…

  • The Keep

    The Keep

    ★★

    I've been meaning to watch this for ages because various people had told me on multiple occasions that it was good. What the fuck, dudes? It's basically "what if we made the Nazi melting bit from Raiders into a whole movie?" to the point that they even include one of the original melting Nazis in the cast. This film is very bad and makes no sense. I think it's meant to be allegorical but it's just a hot mess.


    That…