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  • Bird Box

    Bird Box

    ★★

    The real victims in this movie? The birds. Living in a dark box, undoubtedly filled with their own shit, being shaken violently for days on a river. Just a family of shit-covered, concussed birds.

  • If Beale Street Could Talk

    If Beale Street Could Talk

    ★★★★

    Has some of the same flaws as other highly reverential literary adaptations, but it's so beautifully shot, acted, and scored that I didn't really care.

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  • Passengers

    Passengers

    ½

    In this theater, no one could hear me scream.

  • Sucker Punch

    Sucker Punch

    ½

    In case you were wondering, this is still one the ugliest, most brainless, most unpleasant, and most fucking terrible movies made in your lifetime.