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  • Mortal Kombat

    Mortal Kombat

    ★★

    Nowhere near dumb enough.

  • Step Up

    Step Up

    ★★★

    The kickoff to the the STEP UP franchise, a series I can best describe as "FAST AND THE FURIOUS but make it dancing", falls exactly into the mould you'd expect if you had, like, any idea what "FAST AND THE FURIOUS but make it dancing" is supposed to mean.

    Here's the thing: STEP UP is good, but not great. It's basically a copy of another movie (not only was this written by the SAVE THE LAST DANCE guy, it... essentially…

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  • The Invisible Man

    The Invisible Man

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I had high hopes for this movie, and oh great golly did it let them all down. 

    Packed full with lazy horror tropes and cheap jump scares, and leaning so heavily on all of characters making the worst and dumbest choices, I just couldn’t connect with this at all. 

    It doesn’t help that Adrian is a non-character, which turns him into a checklist of abusive tendencies and nothing more. There’s no specificity to her relationship with him to drive the…

  • Sucker Punch

    Sucker Punch

    ★★★★

    The SUCKER PUNCH defender has logged on.

    For a film that barely anyone saw at the theater, the debate around SUCKER PUNCH can get contentious and fierce. It's a film I've had opinions on, one I've admittedly really enjoyed. But it’s also a film whose problems are ones I try to be careful getting too into the weeds on, because it's not really my place. Specifically, is this film exploitative and male gazey, and does that undercut everything else the…